Personal

2015

I have never felt so optimistic about a new year before. It’s like I’ve taken off a really old pair of my glasses and put on the pair I have now (or the new pair that will be ready for pickup in two weeks). I feel like there’s a weight off my back and my chest doesn’t feel suppressed. For the first time in a long time I actually feel clear-headed and completely hopeful. Let me say, that is an excellent way to go into the new year.

With my grandpa gone, I lost a bit of financial aid along with him. He was like Richard Gilmore (RIP Edward Herrman), he read books, cared greatly about my education and the education of my cousins, and he did what he could to help with the monetary aspects of our lives.  I work and make decent amount of money, but the extra bucks each month definitely helped. Why am I mentioning this? Because, with him gone, I’m entering 2015 without money that I had relied too heavily on. I have everything I want and just replenished my wardrobe with clothes that actually fit me correctly and arent too big (I went down two pant sizes and a cup size), so I can move forward. I feel hopeful that I can learn to live with what I have now and stop buying crap, be even cheaper and wiser about my spending, and completely eliminate my credit card debt in the process.

I also feel hopeful about my health. I have discoid and tumid lupus and experienced some hair loss. This month I’m seeing a new doctor, I’m using meds that will hopefully bring my hair back, and I’m even taking better care of my teeth by attempting to get over my fear of the dentist and go for the first time in a couple years. All of that, plus the weight I’ve lost, I just feel confident about my body for the first time in forever. I just feel healthier.

In addition to all of these things, I start graduate school in a few week. A new major, a new me. So I rearranged my room, cleaned off old things and made them open and new. I’m going to try to start using a planner for the first time since junior high. I redid my personal website, and I plan to get some business cards that look professional. Everything just feels fresh. To top it off, I’m getting reacquainted with my Nikon and I’m going to start using it more often.

New year, new clothes, new outlook, new website, new health, new mindset, new me. Overall, I just feel really positive and I hope this feeling lasts.

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